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Joke of the WEEK
Brought to you by Gwen…
The other day, my friends and I went to a
"Ladies
Night Club." One of the girls wanted to impress the
rest of us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. When the male dancer came over
to us, my friend licked the $10 bill and stuck it to his butt cheek! Not
to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill. She calls the guy
back over, licks the $20 bill, and sticks it to his other butt cheek. In
another attempt to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a
$50 bill and calls the guy over, and licks the bill.
I'm worried about the way things are going, but fortunately she just
stuck it to one of his butt cheeks, again. My relief was short lived.
Seeing the way things are going, the guy gyrates over to me! Now
everyone's attention is focused on me, and the guy is egging me on to try
and top the $50. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet. What
could I do?
I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass, grabbed the
80 bucks, and went home...
Prozac™
Moment of the Week
A certain person (lives in La Salle, has 3 kids) tried out her new
BBQ and set FIRE to her hair! Wish I could say I’m
grateful it’s not me…
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All Around the Towns…
*Laurie has procured
tickets to the Oprah forum in June, and yours truly will be attending
this with her. I am quite excited. Things on the home front have settled
a little (either that or she started taking Prozac) as Laurie has been
heard laughing this week.
* from Karen: “We
had another birth...5 more kittens to that bitch cat that I was telling
you about...in the house so now I can't move her. The mother is just in
her glory that she won the right to stay in the house for a short
time...”and a few days later:
“GAWD DANGIT
BLASTED-CAT...NOW she likes me and when she's not looking after babies
she's constantly showing me her appreciation that I'm letting her stay
in, by rubbing up against my leg! It's like she has always known, despite
she herself being born in a barn that she is destined for the soft cushy,
pampered
lifestyle of a housecat
(I'm suspecting an incarnate here). How am I supposed to trust a cat that
is that damn smart...knows what she wants and how to get it, and won't
settle for anything less...gee, I'm starting to feel some admiration for
this girl! Anyway, the worst part is that Cassidy found them...and there
are 3 all white ones (will probably have Siamese markings)...and after
the untimely demise of Fatso...well you know where this is going...
mmeee, meeee, meee,...”
"Green Acres is the
place to be..."
*Cindy’s wedding
dress (which she ordered a couple months ago), is still not ready. The
seamstress was found gallivanting in Jamaica or somewhere…Good luck with
this Cindy.
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